I feel this weird sensation in my palms after doing Reiki this past Sunday. It’s still with me today. It feels like a tingly sensation that travels up my fingers. It gets like this after I feel an emotion. Maybe just negative emotions and then it gets all tingly. I feel like its vibrating to its own frequency. I feel like its a signal to stop whatever emotion is trying to control me and to just let it pass with my breath.
My friend is very curious about my wedding and what I’m planning to do with everything. Sometimes she asks and sometimes I’ll just go on and on.
But I’m tired of talking about it. What will we talk about once the wedding is over? Nothing I suppose.
It’s already September, and I’m getting married on Black Friday. Two months more to go. We still have the centerpieces to think about, and then the food, and then the invites and then the decor and we’re basically done after that. We still have a lot to do, but we are making progress. We are slowly making this a reality. But I feel like it’s a mad rush at the end to get everything done.
My power was willingly taken from me. But not anymore. My decisions are my own decisions and I want to stick with them. There is no going around in a circle anymore. I want to be in my power. I want to release my power in a kind manner, not being mean or nasty-like. But just staying firm in what I want while still being kind and showing empathy. I want to hold that type of power within me and make it known. I don’t want to be a pushover and I don’t want to have a storm inside of me anymore. I want peace and harmony.
“Divine peace and harmony surround me and dwell in me. I feel tolerance, compassion, and love for all people, myself included.”
This is the mantra I want to live by. I don’t want to be ruled by my parents or with my ego or with my friends or co-workers, or anyone else in this world. I want my heart to rule over me. I want to my love to rule over me. I want my peace and empathy to rule over me. I don’t want any negative emotion or any fears I have to dictate how I act.
This is my intention for the wedding from now on. I still get stressed out, but I can deal with it as long as I have a plan. And as long as I have Derrick.