Just a Rant

I can hear myself say “I’m doing x, y, z for you” more often these days.

But why do I say that when it’s not really for them, but for me?

Maybe if we start saying, “I’m doing this for myself, and in turn it will help you,” it would make your intention that much stronger.

Also, I have been thinking…maybe I’m not as grateful as I should be. I normally rant on and on and on in my own head about how a situation may turn out. And most of the time, I create the worst scenerio in  my own mind and freak out. And when reality hits, it’s not even close to what I was thinking.

One more thing…I’ve been thinking about the prayer I sent out. After that prayer I told myself I wouldn’t repeat it, and I just did. But this time it felt different. I felt more comfortable with me saying what I’ve had been thinking for the past few months. Maybe that’s a good sign.

But no more. I sent out my plead. And that’s all I can do at this point. I don’t want to interfere.

But ruin…ruin is always the start of change. Change can be a good or bad thing depending on the intention behind it.

I have hope with this. I secretly have hope with everything.

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